Thursday, December 04, 2008


Landon believes the TV to be interactive. I'm not sure if he believes it can hear him, but I think he believes that it can see him. I would think it would be the other way around, I am always talking to the TV, or rather to the stupid people on the TV. You would think he'd know that they can hear you, but not see you.

This morning we were running late, and because I'm lazy, the best way to keep him occupied long enough to dress him and me and load the car is to turn on the TV. I generally have the news on, but if I really want him to be still, I turn on Sprout - the pre-school channel. On Sprout they run the most annoying show. No, not Calliou. Pingu. (If it says Barney is on, I generally look to PBS, Nickelodeon or Disney to see if there's anything less offensive on - I should really add Pingu and Calliou to that list, but this child LOVES Calliou.)

Pingu is a penguin. A penguin who...chirps. The entire show contains no words. Just chirps. It makes me long for Calliou and his overly indulgent parents and whiney objections about how nothing is fair. I mean just the other day his friends showed up at his house and one had a ribbon she had won in some contest and he got all upset about not having a ribbon...but he didn't even compete in said contest. No one bothered to tell him that to win, you have to participate and also, you know, win.

So in order to make the little girl feel like her accomplishment meant nothing, Grandma sets up all these games for him to win a ribbon and Calliou just sucks at all of them. They had to play 5 games before Calliou actually won. When the little girl won, she got a ribbon, when the other little boy won, he got a ribbon, but when he won a second game, he didn't get a second ribbon, which he deserved, because he already had a ribbon. Heck even Rosie, Calliou's baby sister, beat him at a race or something because he got distracted. But no bother, just keep playing games until Calliou wins...something...anything. Why aren't kids allowed to feel what it's like to lose anymore?

Wait, I got side tracked.

Landon saw Pingu come on, and said "ing-gwen," he promptly jumped off the bed ran to the bar to get his penguin from his McDonald's happy meal toy collection of doom. What? You don't keep your toddler's toys in the wet bar? Why not? It's the perfect little cubby.

He came back and held the penguin up to the TV. To show Pingu that he had a penguin too, I guess. He seemed a little bit put off by the fact that the TV penguins didn't even acknowledge the penguin in his hand. He stood on his tippy toes and reached as high as he could towards the TV, as if he thought maybe they just couldn't see him. It was no use, the penguins were already in their little clique and his outsider penguin was just going to have to settle for the company of the hippo and the zebra. Not that he felt sorry enough for him to take him to school with him or anything. Just let him freeze in Mom's car while she's at work.

I don't know where I was going with this, except I really needed to get that whole Calliou thing off my chest.


nonsoccermom said...

Calliou is totally annoying. I am SO GLAD that AE is past being interested in that whiny little brat!!

Cant Hardly Wait said...

my 16 month old is obsessed with Spongebob. I wish he was into something less annoying. Like, CSI... or Seinfeld. Gosh.

The Modernish Father said...

I can see where kids get confused, especially with programs like Blue's Clues, Dora and Mr. Rogers, where the people on screen are talking to the audience at home as if it really is interactive.

Calliou is a little punk.

Our daycare teachers insist our daughter is obsessed with Spongebob, but I have yet to see any evidence of this at home. I think they're being misled by the fact that everything she says sounds like "bob".

Aunt Becky said...

Dude. THANK YOU FOR THE CALLIOU COMMENT. I want to punch the TV when his stupid ass gets on there. What a brat! Why don't his parents PARENT him?

Thanks for letting ME get that out.

Stephanie said...

I have no idea what you're talking about, but that totally made me laugh.