Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Is it love?

On the way to school this morning Landon whipped out his play cell phone and ordered me to turn down the radio because he was on the phone.


And then I heard this:


[Landon]: Yes, Abigail… Yes, Abigail… Yes, Abigail… Yes, Abigail… Yes, Abigail… Yes, Abigail… Yes, Abigail… Yes, Abigail


[Me]: Uh, Landon?  Do you ever tell Abigail “no”?


[Landon]: No, Mommy, I LOVE her!


Tuesday, August 09, 2011

Lesbians are taunting me with their nuts.

Last weekend I floated the Comal river for the first time as an adult...a drinking adult. Well, as shy as I am, alcohol tends to unleash my social butterfly ... apparently.

I met all kinds of people. Including - people who had the best nuts I'd ever tasted (or so I think, because - remember? drunk.) Anyway, these people happen to be lesbians from Longview. East Texas middle aged lesbians - had these awesome onion cashews. I ate exactly 3 of them before I got separated from them and lost them forever. But not before finding out that they were from Wal-Mart and getting a good enough look at the bag to see the brand is "World Table" (That would be a Wal-Mart brand.)

So because I have OCD, mostly O, less C, probably alot of D too. I cannot stop thinking about those nuts. I went to two different Wal-Marts in my area and found the brand of nuts, but not that flavor. I looked online only to find out that you cannot order them online, except through e-bay and I refuse to pay $7.50 for a 1/2 lb of nuts when if I can find them in the store they will be roughly $3.

So - I am simply requesting that the next time you mosey down the aisle of Wal-Mart (no one likes to do it, no one likes to admit it, but we all do it eventually at some point) - see if they have them, consider buying me a bag, I will pay you back for them, I swear.

Thursday, August 04, 2011

Monthly Newsletter #58

Dear Landon,

This month has gone by at the speed of light. No seriously, and it’s not just because the last newsletter was really really late either. Anyway, I apologize, but this may be the shortest newsletter yet.

This month you began a weird habit of lying. Not terrible lies, but for instance telling GUL and Kimmie that you are taking a balancing class (I’m not even sure what a balancing class would be.) And that your swimming lessons would just be one day (not true, when I finally get around to signing you up, they will be 2 weeks.) Now, these are kind of funny lies and pretty easily verified, but I in no way want you to think that it’s okay to lie. Ever.

We went to Zoey’s 4th Birthday party. It was all about dinosaurs, complete with volcano cake. Last year you loved her fairy treehouse cake so much you requested the exact same cake for your party – except no fairies, instead you wanted monkeys. I half expected you to have a similar request this year, but you were somehow less impressed by the volcano – instead you’ve decided you need a pirate ship. And something about sand and water…I don’t know, I’ll get you and aunt Kathleen together to work out the details – so long as you don’t expect actual shooting cannons, I think it can be done.

Right now, as I type this, you are at your Grandma and Grandpa Wood’s house. You are in the middle of a week with them. You are having a blast and I’m so glad that you get to spend time with them like that. I used to spend a week with my grandma during the summer sometimes, and we always had a lot of fun. You will have a lot of good memories from those times.

I don’t really have anything for you to work on this month, although I do anticipate a little bit of reprogramming after I get you back from a week with the grandparents – so just be easy on me with that, please.