I went to the kitchen at work yesterday to refill my cup with water, and I spied a brownie. A leftover from a meeting.
I am not supposed to eat those brownies, I tell myself. Because, I'm like actually succeeding in this whole business of trying to be a different shape, and who wants to mess with that?
But I did want the brownie. And I said - "oooh, that's my brownie." Ok, maybe I didn't say it. Maybe I just thought it. I was planning my attack. First, I refill my cup with water, then I'll saunter by and swoop over to pick up the brownie in one smooth motion and then I'll be free and clear to run off to my office and devour the thing.
As I finished filling my cup and I turned around to begin the swoop, the guy who was getting coffee snagged my brownie. Could he not read my mind? Did he not know that was MY brownie? GAH - I needed that brownie. Or maybe I didn't. But I did want it.
I shot him in the back of the head with my laser beams when he walked away. He pretended he didn't feel it, but I know he did.