A post my son is going to be terribly upset about if it's still around when he's a teenager.

One of Landon's testicles swelled up pretty big last week. I noticed it on Wednesday and I thought maybe he sat on it funny - what do I know, I don't have those parts. He said it didn't hurt. So I left him alone.

On Friday he announced, that yeah - it did hurt, but only when touched. So I made an appointment with his pediatrician - luckily they have Saturday hours. I went in thinking it would be another over reaction and something normal.

We were directed straight to Texas Children's Hospital for an ultrasound. With the looming possibilities that included a twisted testicle and emergency surgery, and possible loss of the testicle - or you know, a small regular infection and no biggie. Thanks - really reassuring.

I have to say I was extremely impressed with Texas Children's. On a Saturday afternoon when I arrived, there was one person ahead of me in line to fill out paperwork, and no one in the waiting area. In fact I didn't even have time to get the paperwork filled out before they sent us to triage and then to our little rapid treatment area room.

The ultrasound showed that the testicle appendix (?) was twisted. And it's apparently not a big deal and will resolve itself. After 4 people poked his testicles to make their determinations, and poked them to the point of him being almost in tears (and this almost is pretty big for him - he has a super high tolerance for pain.) I mean, isn't this the happiest little sick kid you've ever seen? And aside from the 2 minutes he was on this stretcher and the time we spent in the ultrasound, he actually didn't sit still very much at all.

I promised ice cream on the way home. He wanted chocolate chip ice cream, with M&M's on top.

He fell asleep on the way home, so I nudged him a little when I got to the intersection and asked him if he still wanted ice cream. And he said "Chocit chi-ups, wif M-n-M spinkles."

We had a follow up yesterday afternoon - still swollen, not as much though and we're supposedly on the downhill side of this whole debacle.

Incredible Pizza Company

On Saturday we ventured into the world of games + pizza. My child is completely unaware that a certain rat named Chuck exists outside of the TV - I believe he thinks it's a TV show that he just keeps missing and is occasionally seeing commercials for.

Anyway - we have an Incredible Pizza Company and I had heard it was really cool, so I got my friend and her two kids to come up and we went to play.

The pizza is ok. It's not great, it's not terrible. The salad bar is decent, and the dessert bar is good.

My child will probably never aspire to the likes of Tiger Woods...which now I think is probably just fine.


Also, probably not going to be a future star of "Dancing with the Stars."

And basket ball? Well, of those 10 points you see there? He threw exactly...none of them.

But, and of course I don't have a picture of it here, he is an awesome shot, so beware any dinosaurs trying to attack us - he's totally got your number.

Mardi Gras - Doggie Style

On Sunday we went down to Galveston with my sister and Zoey and Dylan to watch the parade. The Humane society puts on a pet parade every year and for $20 you can walk your dog in the parade and the proceeds go to the SPCA. We were observers, not participants.


So we parked at 41st street and walked and posed and danced down the seawall to about 31st, then we started heading back while we waited for the parade to begin. It started a good 30-45 minutes late or so.


They were mostly patient, but also kind of tired by the time the parade finally started and any time there was a lag in pets Landon asked if it was over yet.


But he did get some beads and didn't even have to lift his shirt.

The most disappointing piñata ever

Landon made a piñata at school last week. They basically painted a brown paper bag and filled it with...a big wad of colored butcher paper. The tie broke before he even poked a hole in the bag after wacking it a million times with the plastic golf club. And when I picked it up after that I "accidentally" poked a big hole in the side - at which point we abandoned all piñata rules and regulations and I had him stick the golf club in the hole and just pull until he ripped it some more. And even then I had to keep "accidentally" ripping it more to get the giant wad of paper to fall out.

Things and Stuff

Ok, so I got buried under a pile of work this week and last week.

Plus they're doing this reorganization thing where my immediate boss will now be a department manager and he seems to think I want to be in his position, even though I've made it perfectly clear that I want to move to another department by July. Oy - and enough with the procedures already - I just want to get my work done and I don't need a grading system to see if I'm doing it or not. GAH!!!

Anyway - I just want you to know if you noticed the extreme lack of posts over here or the fact that I haven't commented on your blog as of late, I am just exhausted and I don't have time to do much of anything besides work and come home and eat and spend a little time with my kid before I fall unconscious each night.

Also I haven't managed to take very many pictures either because I'm just that tired.

That being said - I have some things to talk about.

If your comment thingie looks similar to this:

I can't comment on your blog from work. But I am still reading it, I swear. And there are several of you who have this format.

Also - I'm not on facebook - which I know makes me an outcast, but since I can't get to it from work either it's not like I'd be on there very much.

Oh and I do have plans this weekend where plans equals picture opportunities, so I am trying to get my act together.

Bald Birds

On the way to dinner last night we saw a HUGE cloud of birds. Like a swarm. Like a plague sized cloud of birds flying over the highway. And I thought it was awfully lucky that I didn't get hit with anything, um...juicy. Nevermind the fact that I am apparently marked as a great target for suicidal birds, I have vehicularly birdslaughtered more than my fair share.

The birds are not flying all in one direction, they seem to be on LSD or something and flying all crazy like and Landon said "When birds fly really really fast, all their feathers fall off and they're naked."

To which I said, "that seems kind of strange, do you lose your hair when you run really fast?"

And he said "Yes! When I run super duper fast!"

That kid is weird sometimes.

Monthly Newsletter #40

Dear Landon,

This month was the fastest month in the history of all time. Or at least of the recent past. I didn’t get a lot of pictures taken of you. Mostly because we just didn’t do that much. For one thing, it’s been cold. We had a hard freeze in Houston, it was below freezing for a whole 3 days. We stayed inside nearly the entire time and everyone’s sprinkler vacuum thingy popped off. Trust me when I say – this was kind of a boring month.

You got your second ever ear infection, and spent almost a whole week at home with Grandma. It probably wouldn’t have taken so long, but you didn’t tell us that your original virus was gone and that you were now working on the ear infection, so we thought we were still dealing with a virus for quite a while.

I think you also learned a new word this month. The word is spicy. You use it correctly, as in, “those sausage balls are kind of good, but they’re kind of spicy.” And you use it strangely, as in “my mouf hurts, it spicy.” I have no idea where you picked up that little quirk, but I’m going with it.

I think you also have developed a new phrase as well – “kind of.” So when something exciting is going to happen and I say “How cool is that?” You think about it for a few seconds and say “Um,…it’s kind of cool.”

I decided right before Christmas that we’d start going to church on Sunday mornings. More specifically, Sunday school. I’ve never been a huge fan of the worship services themselves, I feel like I get more out of a small group discussion than all the other stuff anyway. The room you are in is more like a nursery than a class, but those ladies love you! They already know you by name and they are so impressed with how smart you are. I’m a little confused as to how to respond to that, because I’m not sure I have all that much to do with how smart you are. You’re just a super little sponge and remember everything. It was the decision to go to church that led to your discovery of sausage balls. You love sausage balls. I can get you to do almost anything for a sausage ball. I had made them for a church party, but because you were feverish that day we didn’t get to go. I dropped off the stuff I had agreed to bring and then gave you a sampling of the leftover sausage balls. And you. Fell. In. Love.

Speaking of being smart and remembering things. A few weeks ago you did a study at school about the food pyramid. And now every time you see me using butter on anything you yell “BUTTER IS BAD FOR YOU!” Or more recently “Butter is bad for your body!” I offer you candy or cookies and you say the same thing. I tried to explain the theory of everything in moderation. But I don’t think you’re quite getting it.

I don't have much to ask you for this month. Just keep being sweet and cute and lovable.

Love,

Mama

Creating my own nerdy child.

I have had both of these conversations in the past couple weeks.

Landon: Why it so hard to start bike moving?

Me: Well, the coefficient of static friction is higher than the coefficient of rolling friction.

Landon: Oh.

**************

Landon: Why when you turn that corner, I fall over.

Me: Well, some people would tell you it's centrifugal force, but they'd be wrong, because it's technically inertia.

Landon: Inertia?

Me: Well, it's a law of phyics that things in motion tend to stay in motion and things at rest tend to stay at rest unless acted on by an outside force.

Landon: But I not outside.

***************

Hat tip to Mr. Richardson who taught me both of the above concepts in high school. And he probably thought I wasn't paying attention.