Oy with the poodles already!

Enough with the drama of last week…well, the drama of last Wednesday. I don’t like drama. I don’t like it one bit. I do not like it, Sam, I am. The final straw, so to speak, of drama turned me into a puddle of weepy madness on my kitchen floor yesterday when I got home from work.

So, we were headed to a meat market in Santa Fe Wednesday night after work, and I went home to meet Clint before going to pick up Landon, so we could go straight there. I walked in the back door, and..hey, what’s that light over there…OH MY GOD IT’S THE FREEZER!!! I left the freezer drawer open just enough to thaw everything in there….everything. Ice cream, shrimp, ground beef, pork chops, bacon, chicken, some brisket (thankfully not a whole brisket), some smoked chicken, a bag of ice, frozen veggies, popsicles…oh, what’s that on the floor…dripping…purple stainey-ness all down the grout line across the kitchen floor…that would be my thawed blackberries…nice. That’s annoying enough to clean up. Apparently Scrubbing Bubbles spray, poured on the grout line seriously cleaned that up in minutes without scrubbing. Also ruined a couple of towels by bleaching them with the scrubbing bubbles stuff, but I kind of expected that.

The thing that made me cry into my towel as I wiped the floor of blackberry juice/scrubbing bubbles cocktail, the golden ticket, the one thing that I have been dutifully saving for 2 whole months…my basket of frozen breastmilk…thawed..completely. Much like everything else in the freezer…it cannot be re-frozen. I still haven’t poured it down the drain… it’s hard enough to look at the basket of little baggies, I haven’t been able to bring myself to touch them, because I know I will count them, and then I will know exactly how much was wasted. Without knowing, I can think “all that wasted time and effort,” and it’s still abstract, like it could be 3 hours, it could be 14 hours. After I count them, I will know, I’m sure it will be more than I envisioned. It was enough to leave him over the weekend for Jennifer’s wedding with my mother, I was worried about having enough and began the process of stockpiling to be sure. I have 2 weeks to replace it. And hopefully I will have enough.

It took me a good 3 hours to get over it. Well, not over it, but I’m not as mopey about it as I was. Plans abound, last night I set a second alarm clock to go off every 3 hours, whether Landon woke or not, I pumped, I didn’t get much, but the more I do it, the more I’ll have. He’s turning 6 months this week, so with the introduction of cereal this week, we’ll get to store some that he normally would eat during those feeding times. I think I can make it…I think I can , I think I can.

He’s mad too: