Showing posts with label poop. Show all posts
Showing posts with label poop. Show all posts

Thursday, January 15, 2009

UPDATED: Was there a recall on yesterday that I missed?

UPDATED WITH SCAN OF ELFIN WOMAN: Who is not so much elfin as I remember her, I thought she had pointy ears last night, now she's just big boob sexy comic book stereotype.

Because, I'd like to take mine back and trade it in on a less defective one. Probably not as much as Clinton would like to, but I'd like to none the less.

I stayed late at work yesterday to do a quick project for my project that was supposed to be over, but the client will not let die. Actually the head client guy just seems to be humoring the guy I worked with, because they are asking for things that are not normal deliverables. Anyway, I stayed late.

And I learned a few things.



  • Someone in this office is drawing large breasted elfin looking women after hours, enlarging them to 11x17 paper, making copies and then forgetting to take the original off the copier. If it's who I saw walking away from the copier just before my discovery, this does not compute.



  • I now know why my office doesn't seem very clean. Custodian came to my floor, left the backpack vacuum out in the hall near my office and never showed up again, and I was here until 9:15 or so. Well, he did show up once. He seemed to be wandering around drinking a coke.


That's not the bad part though. Clinton arrived home to a toilet that didn't flush properly. And after 20 or 30 minutes of plunging, and sewage, and running hot water in the bathtub to try to clear what he thought was a clog, he discovered that the clean-out cap was off and our yard was full of hot water.

This is the 3rd or 4th time we've called the utility district, so the guy with the truck, who has always been the same guy who comes, because it always happens in the evening, came out and about 85 feet out from the clean out he found the problem. As usual. It's cleared and things work well again for the moment, but he said since it's happened so much he's going to escalate it to the engineering department. Hopefully they find a fix for it, because it never happens at a nice reasonable time, you know, like when both of us are home and able to deal with it, or when the baby is in a good mood. Poor Landon, he just wanted to help, but Clinton didn't think he should be helping with sewage water.

This morning, when I woke up Landon, his face was in a puddle of blood. The air has been uncharacteristically dry here for about a week, add a toddler and a crusty booger he just wants out, but isn't awake enough to pin point his activities and poof you have a bloody nose! (And, yeah I should probably set up his humidifier again in order to avoid this.) I have said before that they should make peppermints on sticks like lollipops for just this reason. Peppermints will stop a nosebleed, but I don't like giving him a choking hazard so early in the morning. Luckily I found a candy cane leftover from Christmas, so it worked out, but it would seriously be neater if I could just find peppermints in lollipop form.

He really didn't want to be cleaned up. He kept saying "Enough!" But he did get to have candy before breakfast, so he finally gave in a little. On the way to school, sucking away on his candy cane, he had already sharpened it into a shiv like instrument, and he jabbed the inside of his cheek. "Mom, dat hurt!" "Well, bite it off and chew it, so it won't be pointy anymore" "Oooooh, dat good." And he only ate about an inch or inch and a half, so he's not set up for a big sugar crash either.

This evening, I have all kinds of blood stains to look forward to trying to clean off of various articles of clothing and sheets. Because it's not enough to bleed on your own sheets and pajamas, you then need to wipe your nose all over your ready to go work mom, so she has to change clothes, and roll around on her bed as if your goal in life is to have her wash the sheets that were just put on the night before. I guess I don't have a lot of room to talk, I have a blood stained stuffed armadillo from precisely the same kind of behavior.

Maybe there will be a recall on today too.


Friday, December 29, 2006

Poop Stories

Clinton had the day off today, and I had to work. This morning I was running late and even though we have Ashley coming to baby-sit Landon, we told her she could come a little later, since Clinton would be there. Clinton’s still a little afraid to be left alone with Landon for an extended period – and I honestly don’t want to push him to do something he’s not comfortable doing – for his sake and for Landon’s sake.

For those not familiar with a baby’s intestinal working – it’s like a conveyor belt. A reflex in the sucking makes them poop. Milk in, poop out – almost at the same time, or immediately following a feeding anyway.

So I’m late and he’s asleep right up until I should be leaving – and then he wakes up crying. Since I’m going to get to work and immediately pump anyway – I figure I might as well just feed him. So I fed him, and handed him off for burping and ran out the door. I thought he might poop after I left, but I didn’t think it would be a big one, and I thought if nothing else, he’d survive the 30 or so minutes until Ashley got there to change him.

But the little gremlin pooped up his back and all over Daddy, and caused him to have to change a dirty diaper. I didn’t plan it, but if I had, it wouldn’t have worked so well. Anyway, it turns out that he CAN change a dirty diaper! Clinton called me for sympathy. He said he asked Landon if he and I had conspired against him in planning this – and Landon giggled at him. I probably didn’t give him much of the sympathy he was after – I certainly don’t get sympathy when I change a dirty diaper. But I am proud of him for not sticking him in the bathtub and waiting for Ashley.

SIDE NOTE SIDE NOTE SIDE NOTE SIDE NOTE SIDE NOTE SIDE NOTE SIDE NOTE SIDE NOTE

Yes Clint lives with us.

Clint said yesterday that people ask him after I post something about where he was in the story. “Don’t you live with them?” they ask. And I have to say that all the “we” and ‘”us” references kind of sound like I mean Landon and me, but I really mostly mean Clinton, Landon, and me. He’s in there. He may be in the background, but he’s in there.

Right now, I hold a disproportionate amount of duties when it comes to Landon. I am his food, I change his diapers, I get up during the night with him, I take him to his appointments, I was the day care dropper offer/ picker upper and I’m the author of the blog – therefore I will be in more stories than Clinton will be.

That being said, when Clinton starts his blog about taking care of the house – I will be pretty absent from that – as he’s the dishwasher, the vaccuumer, the tidier, the duster, the pool boy, the sprinkler guardian, the lights in the landscaping are burnt out noticer/replacer, the decorator, the trash taker outer, and for the most part, the laundry guy – I’m the one running around making messes for him to clean up. I think I have the better end on this deal.

Gratuitous Christmas Picture: